Misconceptions can be dangerous
Asalaam Wa Alykum Wa Rahmat Allah Hi Wa Barakat
People have brought out a feminist interpretation of the Quran and Sunnah and women rights in Islam. Feminism is a new school of thought which appeared first in west after particularly World War 2. Feminism isn’t a call to women being treated fairly rather it has grown to become a school of thought with various branches like social feminism, liberal feminism, modern feminism etc. We find Muslims here are also calling feminist interpretation of the Quran. They say men have misinterpreted the religion to give them an upper hand.
Before reading further keep in mind that whatever Allah has said is correct. For He knows us better than we ourselves. So even if some things don’t make sense, we should not create apologetic approach and think there is some mistake in the Quran/Hadith. Rather we should realize that its Allah’s words and there has to be some wisdom behind it! Read with an unbiased mind. Below are some doubts that some of us face.
Girls should be less educated. Since the more knowledge they get, the more problematic it becomes.
How can more knowledge be problematic? Girls should be educated especially about their rights in Islam. Also, any Hadith that is directed to the Jamaah as a whole, means that it is directed to the females too. Seeking knowledge is compulsory for ALL Muslims. It is a commandment from Allah for us Muslims to seek (religious) knowledge and if anyone stops us from that (even if it’s our spouse), we are allowed to disobey them. Many brothers feel the more they commit to Islam the more they have the right to oppress their wife. Allah gave the rights to education to women, we didn’t! Man tries to put the women down, suppress her. He has forgotten that it was the women who taught him until he started going to school. Even then, he has to fall back on his mother not only for emotional needs but sometimes for financial needs too.
Muslim men are barbaric because they hit their wives ruthlessly. Also, a Muslim woman cannot enter Paradise until her husband hits her.
If this was true then none of the wives of the Prophet (PBUH) would enter Paradise. The Prophet (PBUH) never struck any on his wives. Now that’s a Sunnah too (not hitting one’s wife). Also, let me make this clear that a Muslim man CANNOT hit his wife in such a way that it pains her a lot. In fact, tapping is to be the last resort. A light tap can be given to a woman AFTER counselling, advising and talking to her and keeping her away in bed.
Men have more rights over their wives in Islam. The wife has no rights over her husband whatsoever.
This type of statement is made by the foolish. They talk because they have to say something. A wise person, on the other hand, talks because he has something to say. After reading the rights of wife, I feel men are the ones who are oppressed lol. What is manhood in Islam? It is not to be harsh to women. We have a wrong concept in Islam about leadership. In concept of hierocracy the leader gives away commands and orders. The concept of corporation is when the two complement each other. The leader is the most responsible person. He is the one thinking about the tribe when the tribe is sleeping. How do these 2 concepts affect our home? The man is the leader of the house; he is not supposed to be a dictator. If his wife is correct then he should say, “Alhamdullah, indeed you are correct”
Islam allows men to have up to four wives…that’s why I like being a Muslim guy :D
If that’s your attitude then know that polygamy is not to fulfil one’s desires. But polygamy provides a solution to some of life’s problems. When there is a shortage of men, for example after a devastating war, many women will be unable to find husbands. Most women in that situation, given the option, would rather be a co-wife than no wife. If one maintains a strict monogamy in such a situation, moral depravity is bound to result. In fact recent research has predicted that in a number of years, women will outnumber men greatly. Let me give a crash course on how this will happen. A female has XX chromosome where as a male has XY chromosome in him. The sex of a baby is determined by these pair of chromosomes. Men are capable to give away either an X or a Y chromosome to the forming child. However, a female will always give away an X chromosome. Research has shown that the Y chromosomes in males are becoming weaker as the new generations are produced. This will eventually lead to men being close to extinct. All of this process will occur in a million years which right now may seem quite a long time but in evolution theology, this is a short span of time. à This is just the general idea. I’m not a medical student to be able to explain it more clearly.
Notice that the Quran permits but does not command a man to have four wives. Furthermore, the Quran stipulates that a man is responsible for the maintenance of his wife or wives. If a man has more than one wife, he has to provide separate living accommodation for each of his wives.
Multiple marriages are a heavy responsibility on the male. It is not a pleasure trip as some people may assume. Some even imagine all kinds of sexual exploits involving a man and his wives altogether. However, such activity is not permissible in Islam. A man must divide his time equally among his wives. He may, for example, spend one night with each wife on a rotating schedule.
If a man cannot maintain justice in the treatment of his wives, the Quran stipulates that he is to have no more than one wife.
As there came a commandment for women to be obedient to their husband, Allah also orders for men to be very kind and gentle to their women. Men have to take care of their wives or else they will be questioned
How come women don’t get to have four husbands L??
The reasons why Islam prohibits a woman from having more than one husband are:
1) Man is more polygamous by nature as compared to a woman.
2) Biologically, it is easier for a man to perform his duties as a husband despite having several wives. A woman, in a similar position, having several husbands, will not find it possible to perform her duties as a wife.
3) A woman who has more than one husband will have several sexual partners at the same time and has a high chance of acquiring venereal or sexually transmitted diseases which can also be transmitted back to her husband even if all of them have no extra-marital sex. This is less likely in a man having more than one sexual partner, and none of them having extra-marital sex. (Dr. Zakir Naik)
Shaykh al Islam Ibn Qiyyaam said: That is the wisdom of the Lord and His kindness and mercy towards His slaves and His taking care of their affairs. If it were permitted for a woman to have two husbands or more, the world would be corrupted, lineages would be lost, the husbands would kill one another, there would be great misery and tribulation, and there would be continuous trouble. How could a woman be in a good position if she were shared by a number of men who were fighting all the time? How could the men who share her be in a good situation?
How is this fair that Muslim men can marry an Ahl’ Al Kitaab while Muslim women cannot?
This still remains a man dominated society. Wives are still oppressed and tortured by their husbands (in various cultures/religions). Also, Allah says:
Made lawful to you this day are At-Tayyibat [all kinds of Halal (lawful) foods, which Allah has made lawful (meat of slaughtered eatable animals, milk products, fats, vegetables and fruits)]. The food (slaughtered cattle, eatable animals) of the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians) is lawful to you and yours is lawful to them. (Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time when you have given their due Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage), desiring chastity (i.e. taking them in legal wedlock) not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girl-friends. And whosoever disbelieves in Faith [i.e. in the Oneness of Allah and in all the other Articles of Faith i.e. His (Allah's) Angels, His Holy Books, His Messengers, the Day of Resurrection and Al-Qadar (Divine Preordainments)], then fruitless is his work; and in the Hereafter he will be among the losers. [Al-Maeda, Chapter #5, Verse #5---interpretation of the meaning]
Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe... [Al-Baqara:221---interpretation of the meaning]
Islam must be exalted and cannot be subjugated, so how could a Muslim woman be put under the care of a kafir man, when the man is normally naturally in a stronger position? In such a situation he could cause her to corrupt the practice of her religion or force her into sub dual by causing her to live a life of oppression with him. He could also prevent her from practicing some of her religious rites.
It is forbidden for Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men, according to the Qur’an, the Sunnah and the consensus of the scholars (ijmaa’). If such a marriage takes place, it is invalid, it does not have any impact upon inheritances according to sharee’ah, and any children born from this union are illegitimate. Hoping that the husband may become Muslim does not alter this ruling in the slightest.
Whats up with the fashion of head scarf among Muslim women…do they have less hair?
Some non Muslims consider women wearing hijaab and Islamic clothing as oppressed and that’s because they consider nakedness to be freedom. It is a recognised fact that men are attracted to women and most of them look at women as a mere object to fulfill their desire. That’s why we see a lot of women in advertisements. Islam considers women to be the pearl of society. When a nun wears the hijaab, she is considered one who is devoted her life to god. When a Muslim woman wears it, she is oppressed!
I really liked the way one of the sisters commented about the hijaab. She said, “If a room is full of (cheap) white marbles, and if there is also one that is pure and red, sure enough it needs a jewel box for protection. If I am that pure and red marble, my hijaab is that jewel box that protects me.. Hijaab covers my head NOT the brain!!!..”
Islam highly respects woman, and they are considered as the ‘jewels and diamonds in mankind due to Islam. So it forbids all such acts that can cause pain and disrespect for woman (for instance a hooligan who is waiting for an opportunity to tease a girl)
The main purpose of hijaab is a ’security’ for woman! Even with scientific point of view, wearing hijaab saves woman beauty and skins’ sensitive pigments. Moreover, woman wearing incomplete dress of course tempt opposite sex...which ultimately result into ‘rape cases’
Women do not get to say the magic word “Talaak”
Talaak is not a simple word. DON’T play with this word. Yet it is used as a type of blackmail to abuse women. The prophet (PBUH) used to get angry when he heard this word. Marriage is a contract between two parties. Beware of the dua’a of oppressed person. There is no barrier between the dua’a of an oppressed person and Allah. If that woman is humiliated, she falls down and is crying to Allah and she raises her hand, and she turns to Allah against you or me, we are in trouble. We have situations here where a woman is hanging between marriage and divorce. The husband doesn’t care for her, doesn’t fulfill her needs and says “I won’t treat her fairly but i won’t divorce her”. Some men think the only way to be separated is for them to say divorce. But the prophet (PBUH) told us a way, known as khullah, where the imam can step in and separate the marriage without the husband’s permission.
There are certain conditions for men to keep in mind before giving divorce. In divorce a man can divorce his wife by saying talaak thrice over three menstrual period. And if the woman is pregnant then he has to wait till delivery. All this time he has to support her and till 2 yrs of childbirth. When a women takes khullah, she only needs a valid reason.
NOTE: If the woman wants then she can state a term in the marriage contract that if the man marries someone else besides her, she will divorce him. This is the only case in my knowledge where a woman is allowed to give divorce if this condition is violated.
Islam considers women to be so dumb that one man witness is replaced by two women witnesses :S
O you who believe! When you contract a debt for a fixed period, write it down. Let a scribe write it down in justice between you. Let not the scribe refuse to write as Allah has taught him, so let him write. Let him (the debtor) who incurs the liability dictate, and he must fear Allah, his Lord, and diminish not anything of what he owes. But if the debtor is of poor understanding, or weak, or is unable to dictate for himself, then let his guardian dictate in justice. And get two witnesses out of your own men. And if there are not two men (available), then a man and two women, such as you agree for witnesses, so that if one of them (two women) errs, the other can remind her. And the witnesses should not refuse when they are called (for evidence). You should not become weary to write it (your contract), whether it be small or big, for its fixed term, that is more just with Allah; more solid as evidence, and more convenient to prevent doubts among yourselves, save when it is a present trade which you carry out on the spot among yourselves, then there is no sin on you if you do not write it down. But take witnesses whenever you make a commercial contract. Let neither scribe nor witness suffer any harm, but if you do (such harm), it would be wickedness in you. So be afraid of Allah; and Allah teaches you. And Allah is the All-Knower of each and everything. [Al-Baqara, Chapter #2, Verse #282---interpretation of the meaning]
Allah has commanded the testimony of two women so as to be sure that they remember, because the mind and memory of two women takes the place of the mind and memory of one man. This does not mean that a woman does not understand or that she cannot remember things, but she is weaker than man in these aspects – usually. Scientific and specialized studies have shown that men’s minds are more perfect than those of women (Encyclopaedia Britannica has a whole article proving this…due to space I won’t write the proves), and reality and experience bear witness to that. The books of knowledge are the best witness to that; the knowledge which has been transmitted by men and the Hadiths which have been memorized by men far outnumber those which have come via women.
Nevertheless, there are some women who are far superior to men in their reason and insight, but they are few, and the ruling is based on the majority and the usual cases.
The point is that usually – and no wise person would dispute this – most of the prominent people in the religious sciences, such as fiqh, hadeeth, tafseer, ‘aqeedah and preaching, and in the worldly sciences such as medicine, astronomy, engineering, physics, chemistry, etc. are men.
The fact that women are lacking in reason does not mean that they are crazy, rather their reason is often overtaken by their emotions, and this happens to women more often than it happens to men. No one would deny this except one who is arrogant. Most kids like to go to their fathers for advices. Why? Think about it with a fair mind.
Men will have more than one wife in heaven…..that’s unfair for women who don’t want to share their hubbies
A woman’s jealousy concerning her husband is something that is innate and natural, and you cannot tell a woman, “Do not feel jealous over your husband.” If a person dislikes something even though it is prescribed in sharee’ah, that does not adversely affect him, so long as he does not hate the fact that it is prescribed. For instance, the woman who feels jealous does not hate the fact that Allah has allowed her husband to have/marry more than one woman, but she hates to have a co-wife. There is an obvious difference between the two matters.
The least of the people of Paradise will have two wives, and some will have more than that. Al-hoor al-‘iyn will be wives of the men in Paradise, in addition to their wives from among the people of this world.
Fairness or justice is to be found in the rulings of sharee’ah, not in what a person thinks who does not know sharee’ah and its rulings, let alone the reasons behind them. The sisters who says men having more wives to be unfair thinks that the jealousy in her heart, and what it leads to of depression and sorrow will remain with her in Paradise, but this is not correct. Allah says
And We shall remove from their breasts any (mutual) hatred or sense of injury (which they had, if at all, in the life of this world); rivers flowing under them, and they will say: ‘All the praises and thanks be to Allah, Who has guided us to this, and never could we have found guidance, were it not that Allah had guided us! Indeed, the Messengers of our Lord did come with the truth.’ And it will be cried out to them: ‘This is the Paradise which you have inherited for what you used to do’ [al-A’raaf 7:43---interpretation of the meaning]
There is nothing but joy and happiness in Paradise; there is no room for hatred and rancour in the hearts of the people of Paradise. Al-hoor al-‘iyn are something which Allah has created to honour the people of Paradise and to increase their delight. Moreover a man will be given the strength of one hundred men, so the large number will not have any effect on a woman, and her feelings towards her co-wives and her husband’s concubines will not be like her feelings in this world
Women will be the majority in hell, so why bother worship?
This gives all the more reason to worship.
It was narrated from the Prophet (PBUH) that women will form the majority of the people of Hell. It was narrated from ‘Imraan ibn Husayn that the Prophet (PBUH) said: “I looked into Paradise and I saw that the majority of its people were the poor. And I looked into Hell and I saw that the majority of its people are women.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3241; Muslim, 2737)
It was narrated that Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri said:“The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) went out to the Musalla on the day of Eid al-Adha or Eid al-Fitr. He passed by the women and said, ‘O women! Give charity, for I have seen that you form the majority of the people of Hell.’ They asked, ‘Why is that, O Messenger of Allah?’ He replied, ‘You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands. I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religious commitment than you. A cautious sensible man could be led astray by some of you.’ The women asked, ‘O Messenger of Allah, what is deficient in our intelligence and religious commitment?’ He said, ‘Is not the testimony of two women equal to the testimony of one man?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘This is the deficiency in her intelligence. Is it not true that a woman can neither pray nor fast during her menses?’ The women said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘This is the deficiency in her religious commitment.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 304)
It was narrated that Jaabir ibn ‘Abd-Allaah said: “I attended Eid prayers with the Messenger of Allah (PBUH). He started with the prayer before the khutbah, with no adhaan or iqaamah. Then he stood up, leaning on Bilaal, speaking of fear of Allah (taqwa) and urging us to obey Him. He preached to the people and reminded them. Then he went over to the women and preached to them and reminded them. Then he said, ‘Give in charity, for you are the majority of the fuel of Hell. A woman with dark cheeks stood up in the midst of the women and said, ‘Why is that, O Messenger of Allaah?’ He said, ‘Because you complain too much and are ungrateful to your husbands.’ Then they started to give their jewellery in charity, throwing their earrings and rings into Bilaal’s cloak.” (Narrated by Muslim, 885)
With regard to her lacking in religious commitment, that is because when she is menstruating or bleeding following childbirth, she does not pray or fast, and she does not make up the missed prayers, so this is lacking in religious commitment. But this lacking is not something for which she is called to account or blamed, rather it is something that happens by the will of Allah; for He is the One Who has prescribed that out of kindness towards her and so as to make things easier for her, because if she were to fast during menses and nifaas, that would harm her. By His mercy Allah has prescribed that she should not fast at the time of menses and nifaas, and she should make it up after that.
With regard to prayer, at the time of menses she is unable to purify herself, so by His mercy Allah has prescribed that she should not pray, and the same applies to nifaas, and He has not prescribed that she should make it up, because making it up would be very difficult, as prayers are offered five times a day, and menses may last for several days, seven or eight or more, and nifaas may last as long as forty days. So by His mercy and kindness towards her, Allah has waived the duty of offering and making up prayers.
This does not mean that her reason is lacking entirely, or that her religious commitment is lacking entirely, rather the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that the lack in her reasoning has to do with what may happen of her testimony not being accurate, and the lack in her religious commitment has to do with what may happen of her missing prayers and fasts at the time of menses and nifaas. But that does not imply that she is less than a man in everything, or that a man is better than her in everything.
References:
Dr Abdullah Hakim Quick, The Dilemma of Muslim women
Shaykh Ali Al Tamimi, Feminism and Islam
Shaykh Ali Al Tamimi, Muslim women facing Challenges
Abu Abdis Salaam, False portrait-Women in Islam and the West
Wahiduddin Khan, 2004, Women between Islam and Western Society
www.metronews.ca
http://www.fbi.gov/homepage.htm
http://islamgreatreligion.wordpress.com/2009/06/21/a-message-for-muslim-females-from-a-sister
www.searchtruth.com
www.islaminfo.com
www.islamqa.com
www.muftisays.com
Dr Abdullah Hakim Quick, The Dilemma of Muslim women
Shaykh Ali Al Tamimi, Feminism and Islam
Shaykh Ali Al Tamimi, Muslim women facing Challenges
Abu Abdis Salaam, False portrait-Women in Islam and the West
Wahiduddin Khan, 2004, Women between Islam and Western Society
www.metronews.ca
http://www.fbi.gov/homepage.htm
http://islamgreatreligion.wordpress.com/2009/06/21/a-message-for-muslim-females-from-a-sister
www.searchtruth.com
www.islaminfo.com
www.islamqa.com
www.muftisays.com
